One might think that after being yelled at thousands
of times, we Aspergers would ‘get’ that people’s stories of frustration (which often
are the result of failed actions repeated over and over, or are due to a simple lack of practical or
scientific knowledge) are not requests for help. We stupidly persist because it
is in our nature to solve problems. If a person describes a situation that is causing
them confusion and pain, and if I can unravel a tangle of erroneous beliefs and
misinformation that is causing it, why wouldn’t I make the effort?
This desire to substantially aid another human being
is considered a great defect. As a group Aspergers people are accused of being blind to
the minds of other people, and that empathy, compassion, or any ability to put
ourselves in someone else's shoes is absent from our soulless bodies. The
truth is that it is our desire to help in ways that produce results. Unfortunately the
social definition of empathy rejects and excludes rational response and tangible
returns. A theater of gestures, facial expressions, and words of sympathy and
commiseration are not only preferred, but demanded and scrutinized by the
gatekeepers of ‘normal’ as the sole measure of human feeling. It’s a cruel
system.
This narrow definition of what it means to be human
not only impinges on the freedom of Asperger types, but neurotypicals as well are
stripped of honest communication by the well-policed forms expression that
society imposes. The majority of any population - low ranking children, women,
minorities and the poor, are required to stifle their thoughts and reactions in
order to preserve the power of the social pyramid. Empowering
people with the courage to speak honestly is socially taboo, because honest communication between people confers equality.
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